As I lay dying
by LoveIsAlwaysLouder
Summary: RE-RE Written with new additions coming in second chapter!There can only be one victor,only one to walk away,but as she sat there clutching the hand of the one she loved she knew what she had to do. She would not let them win.


As I lay dying AN:Sorry there was just some Basic errors in this that i HAVE to correct because they are driving me insane. Im also going to be adding some elements to the second chapter that i felt i missed the first time around. I know i posted this stroy forever ago but i took a look at it today and i just really feel the need to clean it up :P Disclaimer: all rights go to rightful people

Before the berries could reach either one of our tongues, before the promised peace of death could envelop either one of our war torn Bodies, the ground beneath my weakened figure was stripped away. For a split second I fly through the air, propelled upward by the power of the explosion, I imagine my father. Was this how he felt? Having the ground ripped away from him, his body torn in every which direction? Am I destined to meet the same fate as he? Killed by the greed of the Capitol fired by an explosion that wasn't anyone's fault except the slave masters that we have been serving under for years? Before my body makes harsh contact with the harsh earth, I am thankful that I am at least above the ground, that I can die watching the sky above me, hoping that whatever up there will take my soul under its wing when it leaves this cruel existence. I am prepared to die, prepared to leave this waste land of a world we have been left with. What I wasn't prepared for was the horrible sound that reached my ears. It was him. Crying out in more agony than anything anyone had experienced in the Arena. I try to open my eyes, but the only thing I can see around me is the whorls of ash, and spurts of fire. His voice is clear, is pain evident.

"PEETA!" I scream out. Trying to rise to my feet, stumbling, my head spinning. I get no response but he continues to shriek in pain. I call his name again. And again. Helpless not sure which way to run, what direction he lay dying. This was our punishment. For not playing by the rules in their twisted game. One of us would die. Not both. Only one, and by the sounds coming from his weakened body, it was going to be him. I stumble, calling his name helplessly. Why him? Why not me? As I breathe in the ashes invade my lungs my already unclear head starts spinning even faster. I cough, my lungs begging for clear air . I once again imagine my father, As he lay buried in rubble, Clean air miles above ground, impossible to reach. I can feel myself begin to lose balance as the ground comes ever closer. Maybe just maybe, death will claim me first. They would have to let Peeta live after that right? He would be the victor. Go back to District 12, back home. Just as I am about to close my eyes for what I am sure is to be the last time, the smog around me clears and despite the haze filling my head, I can see clearly laying 20 feet way from me in an ever growing pool of blood, the only living thing that had kept me going. The person that I had risked everything to cure. The one I was sure disserved to leave here alive. Despite my bodies screaming protest I bring myself to my feet. My blackened Lungs once again scream his name. I ran as fast as my body will allow, falling to my knee's next to him. His eyes are closed, and despite his shouts of pain only moments ago he had fallen silent. No. no he can't be dead, not now. Despite the fact that it feels like all water has drained its self from my body I can feel hot tears roll down my face.

" wake up" I whisper, clutching onto his hand,

"Please, just wake up" the only thing that kept me hopeful was that the cannon was yet to fire, he was still in there. Still with me. His eye lids slowly lifted, barely open, but I could feel his hand contract around mine, assuring me that he knew I was here. His voice was hoarse barely audible, but I could hear him whisper my name.

" Don't talk" I beg him, not wanting to drain what little life still remained within him. But he continued. His breathe heavy between every word, struggling to bring air into his lungs.

" it was real, all of it" he whispered, struggled to bring the smallest of smiles to his lips. I had completely forgotten that we weren't alone here, that every person all across Panam was watching us, not understanding what Peeta meant. But I did. I think I had known it all along. That he was never acting , that none of this for him was pretend. I also knew that without me realizing, I wasn't pretending either. At that moment nothing and no one was on my mind accept the boy lying in front of me covered his own blood, slowly fading away, the boy who had given me hope all those years ago with just a simple loaf of bread. The boy who had kept me going all those night when I had only wanted to let go and let the darkness wash over me.

Letting another tear fall down my face, I held his hand a little tighter.

" Its all real." I stated, he used what was left of him to smile a little wider. It was as if that was the only thing that was holding him to this life, he had only wanted to know that he wasn't making up my true feelings for him in his head, that it was real, that we were real. As his eyes closed, he let one last whisper escape his lips, to the people watching on TV at home, his words were lost, but I knew. It was what I had on some level always known. That he loved me. The next second the cannon fired, and he was gone, and i was alone.

My head once again began to spin. My eyes swimming in the tears that were sure to drowned me. This wasn't real. It couldn't be real. I wasn't leaving here without him. Suddenly a voice rang out all over the arena, reaching ever corner

" Ladies and Gentleman the winner on the 74th annual hunger game Katniss Everdeen!" The announcers words were lost. My thoughts cleared. I couldn't, and wouldn't let them win. They had used me, destroyed me, but there was one thing I would not give the, I would not be their victor. I would not become a symbol of the people who had torn my life apart. I could hear the cover craft coming, I knew what I had to do, I just didn't know how. I had nothing left in which to do it. But than I felt something, something underneath the fingers of my hand that wasn't holding desperately to Peetas. I looked down, a single ash covered berry lay on the ground beside me. Would it be enough? It would have to be. The hover craft was on top of me the metal arms coming to scoop up his lifeless body, and carry me away to a life that would only benefit those who had ruined mine, so as I looked up in the sky, straight into the faces of the game makers on board the craft. I popped the berry into my mouth. Death came quickly, as I had expected it too. I felt myself begin to slip away, I lay my head onto Peeta's lifeless chest and let the darkness wash over me. We would be together again, in a place where nothing was feared. 


End file.
